Dear Dreary.
I'm 57 yrs old and consider myself a bit of an expert when it comes to the old rock and roll and have been to quite a number of concerts in my time. Suffice to say I've collected some very rare memorabilia and wonder if your readers are up for bidding for a slice of rock n roll history.
I've got a bus ticket that I got when I got the bus to see The Bay City Rollers in 1973. Les McEwan caught a bus once, so I'd say that's a pretty rare ticket.
I've also got a rare 1967 Fleetwood Chronicle which was published when The Beatles were still going.
Lot three is a drum stick which the drummer of the support band threw into the audience at The Jaggy Jiggy the week before U2 played there.
My most treasured piece of pop treasure is a photo of the transit van Slade used on their first tour of the midlands in an early edition of auto trader. My uncle actually bought it for scrap and the steering wheel ended up on our kids go cart.
Serious offers only. No time wasters.
Yours,
Sturgeon Pencil-Tree.


Ah Sturgeon,
you've finally resurfaced. My initial reaction to this blatant and pathetic attempt at self-publicity was to dismiss it out of hand. How dare you abuse the nation's favourite column with your petty, squalid collection of dross. Did you contact Dalton's Weekly when you required advice on your 'habits' all those years ago? No,of course you did'nt. You came to me,in a desperate effort to distance yourself from the snivelling group of privileged MP's who were to become known as the Tory Whip Boys. Thatcher's bumspiders, more like.
So it is my pleasure to alert the public,to let the nation know that this dangerous, shameless grovelling, upper class dog scrote is back in society. The public servant who based his election campaign in a teenage brothel next door to the home of an infamous Marseille paedo. The sponging, alcoholic, perverted smack-head who abused his position once too often.
My only advice to you,dog, would be to lay low. One thing i never got to the bottom of perv.
Did Maggie squeal as the cattle prod parted her lips?
Pentonville's gain is our loss,readers.
Dreary. x