Dear Dreary.
You may have heard of my blog, 'keeping itallinplace.com'. I conduct research into male underwear and pass on the findings to my loyal band of followers. I thought your readership may be interested in my latest trials. I spent last weekend wearing a pair called 'Loving Cup'. With their feature 'snuggles' front lining, they give the impression of the swannicles being stroked ever so tenderly by a cupped palm of fur fingers. Comfortable in the extreme, but there is a good chance that in warm weather betty swallocks will put in an unwanted appearance. Do NOT exercise whilst wearing these pants as there is a risk of genitalia combustiosis. In complete contrast, 'The Vice', an online purchase, lift and separate the testicles by use of a tight band of elastic that runs from anus to waistband, pinning them, in effect, to the lower torso. In a non-physical setting there is a certain pleasure to be had, but any type of exertion or unexpected arousal can result in a traumatic entrapment of the cheesestring. or even worse, chaffing of the foreskin. The resulting medical examination, believe me, is as painful as it is embarrassing.
'Trapdoor' by the Boxer Company, are much more to my liking. Their 'airflow' split-crotch technique allows for natural hang and a hands free approach to urination. Part of the fun in wearing these is the fact that you can never be quite 100% sure how the little buggers are going to hang, giving scope for endless hours of fun in business meetings or when watching antiques roadshow. 'The Hammock' also allows the wind to cool the trossuchs, but does so by employing drawstrings around the top of the thighs.
If one cuts off the bottom of one's trouser pockets, these can be released at a moments notice. M + S have recently introduced a new 'Peek-A-Boo' range that includes a new version of the old elephant's trunk posing pouch. The end of the penis protrudes through a fine-mesh panel, pulling the foreskin back so that 'jumbo' is ready for action. The kosher version is slightly cheaper. Always be aware of the danger of the zip. Perhaps advisable not to wear these if you are drinking alcohol. designed for use with the current trend of wearing trousers on or below the hips where the crotch hangs low,between the thighs. Be aware, it is worryingly easy to 'bollock' oneself by walking too quickly. This can cause the chariot to swing TOO low, especially when the testicles are heavily-laden. The 'Egg Poacher' briefs, however, are ideal for breeding purposes as the scrotum is kept at a constant temperature by an insert of plastic insulation. The insert also catches any wayward emmissions, but always remember to remove it before washing the pants as the insert is not washable.
That's it for now! I always get to keep the pants after i've trialled them. Would you or the current Mr. Dreary be interested in a pair or two? I can wash them if you prefer.
Regards, Dick Hare, Phallus-On-The-Mound.

Dear Dick.
Fantastic ideas! There's certainly a gap in the market.
At the minute you can't move for ladies pantie lines.
The Hamsters Hammock is popular with the girls at the moment as is the Smugglers Cave.
The Drip Tray and Hoof Slipper are another popular choice.
Fingals cave is fashionable for snooty musical types whilst Cripple Creek is a rest home 'must have'.
For night time we have the Beavers Retreat and Fishermans Friend.
I could go on but I'm late for work.
Carry on!!
Dreary. xxxxxxx