Dear Dreary.
The ink has run out of my pen!
Sebastian Biro.
Inklington.


Dear Sebastian.
This worries me slightly. The production of semen from the testes should continue well into old age to some degree. Though you fail to mention your age or any recent problems, to say you have simply dried up probably masks an underlying issue of some kind. Are you suffering from stress at work maybe, or under pressure to perform in the bedroom? Have you experienced a recent blow to the coconuts or are they mis-shaped or swollen? It's possible that supply lines may have become blocked or even that there has been a total tube strike. Or,more likely,your lifelong history as a serial masturbator has finally caught up with you. My advice? As the great Greek philosopher Coppernickers once said, '' If there's nowt left in't tank, find thee a fresh hobby and fill up lad''.
Dreary. x